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 Stimulus Cheque

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Bernermom
Learning the Ropes
Learning the Ropes
Bernermom

Posts : 184
Join date : 2010-04-28

PostSubject: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 12:28 pm

Sometime this year, we taxpayers will receive an ' HST Compensation'' payment.

This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

Q. What is an 'HST Compensation' payment ?

A. It is money that the provincial government will send to taxpayers.

Q.. Where will the government get this money ?

A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the economy by spending your compensation cheque wisely:

* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China orSri Lanka ...

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.

* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China .

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras andGuatemala ..

* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go
to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in Canada by:

1) Spending it at yard sales, or

2) Going to hockey games, or

3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

4) Beer or

5) Tattoos.

(These are the only Canadian businesses still operating in Canada. )

Conclusion:

Go to a hockey game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard
sale and drink beer all day !

No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.
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Snitty
Warmed up
Warmed up
Snitty

Posts : 2273
Join date : 2010-01-26
Age : 39
Location : Woodstock, Ontario

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 12:36 pm

Bernermom wrote:


Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.


*snort :lol:
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yorkiemom
Moderator
Moderator


Posts : 11982
Join date : 2009-10-21

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 12:44 pm

Now that was funny,but sadly all to true

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BigBrownEyes29
Admin
Admin
BigBrownEyes29

Posts : 4527
Join date : 2009-10-23
Location : Ontario, Canada

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 3:33 pm

Giggle That is so true.
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Smoosh
Learning the Ropes
Learning the Ropes
Smoosh

Posts : 59
Join date : 2010-02-15

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 6:06 pm

Okay,t hat was too funny! :lol:
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Mousey
Warmed up
Warmed up
Mousey

Posts : 2469
Join date : 2009-11-04
Age : 40
Location : Planet Earth

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Tue 25 May 2010, 9:09 pm

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cureforboredom
Settling in
Settling in
cureforboredom

Posts : 231
Join date : 2010-04-28
Age : 41
Location : Ontario

PostSubject: Re: Stimulus Cheque   Wed 26 May 2010, 7:48 pm

A cheque would really stimulate me right now!
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