You've got to be fucking kidding me-- rant ahead

I just found out that yet an other one of my fucking cousins is pregnant. A 21 year old that got wasted last weekend for her birthday, and shes 6 weeks preggers. Oh! The kicker... she wasn't looking to get pregnant. It is so fucking frustrating that everyone around me is getting knocked up and I can't. The worst part is, every god dammed shower I go to, I'm going to get asked when I plan on having babies, which will only dredge up more thoughts and feelings. Like I really need that shit. I am so frustrated. It sucks that I am good at almost everything I do, but for some reason the one thing I want I can't do.

What is meant to be will happen............ I know I know, STFU But give it time ....... it will happen

Sorry to hear bullet

If it helps i'm sure her baby will be ugly and when yours comes she'll be beautiful

I can imagine how frustrating that is. Maybe you can make up an excuse not to go to the shower, and avoid the annoying comments.

Like Izzy mentioned, it will happen when you least expect it to. You just have to relax give it time.

Like D. mentioned, your cousin will probably have a fugly baby. My cousin did. She had the ugliest, hairiest, big headed baby I had ever seen.

{{{{{hugs}}}}} is all I can offer , I really wish you were not so disappointed .

I know how you feel when you see others who might not deserve or appreciate being blessed by the opportunity to be a parent . I was so desperate I begged my husband to let me adopt , wasn't what he wanted to do .

Now that I am older I don't miss not having more children but when I was younger I can't begin to tell you how many gut wrenching tears I cried .

Aww Bulllet Im so sorry,

I can totally feel your pain, and know how frustrating it is.

Being in health care I get calls all the time about complications due to abortions, or teens with babies, and my heart breaks a little everytime..

Bullet, You'll acheive what you want.. Did you try out fertility treatments? I found a real good site in Ottawa, with a high sucess rate. If you want the information let me know..

XoXoX

Izzy, you are probably right, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to say STFU LOL

D, you always know whats best to say LOL

BBE, and feathers, thank you as well.

I had about an hour where even the smallest sound made me scream and want to break things.. then the tv paused on a freaking baby commercial of all things and I broke down. Drew just sat with me because he knew there was nothing else he could do.

I know it will happen when it happens, but it doesn't stop me from feeling like a failure because I can't get it right.... I know, I know, it takes a lot and only a small percentage get it, but dammit, I still want it.

Thank you Mika, I have an appointment with a specialist but the one I am booked with isn't available until December so my doctor is going to get me into a different one. I'm just glad that our parents haven't started in on the asking, then I'd have to avoid everyone.

kbullet wrote:

Izzy, you are probably right, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to say STFU LOL

D, you always know whats best to say LOL

BBE, and feathers, thank you as well.

I had about an hour where even the smallest sound made me scream and want to break things.. then the tv paused on a freaking baby commercial of all things and I broke down. Drew just sat with me because he knew there was nothing else he could do.

I know it will happen when it happens, but it doesn't stop me from feeling like a failure because I can't get it right.... I know, I know, it takes a lot and only a small percentage get it, but dammit, I still want it.

Thank you Mika, I have an appointment with a specialist but the one I am booked with isn't available until December so my doctor is going to get me into a different one. I'm just glad that our parents haven't started in on the asking, then I'd have to avoid everyone.

I had a mini breakdown much like yours but at work in a bathroom stall. lol

Awww bullet my heart goes out to you!!

Bullet I am so sorry you are hurting as bad as you are,I wish I could help some way

I'm sorry Bullet. It doesnt seem fair when you try so hard to get pregnant and someone else does that shouldnt be.
I'll be thinking good fertile thoughts for you.

Aww sorry Bullet, I don't want to repeat what everyone else said but...Dito. >>>>HUGS<<<.

*Just hugs. Tight*

Sorry bullet

Ah sorry to hear that Bullet.

Like others have said.

When it is meant to be it will happen

Sorry to hear about what you're going through KB. I can't say I know how it feels, since I'm childless by choice, but my sister-in-law (whom I'm very close with) is going through the same frustration. Friends, family get knocked up effortlessly, and she's on fertility drugs etc...etc...etc.. She cries (and not tears of joy) when others close to her get pregnant. There's nothing I can offer her, that can or will console her, so I won't pretend with you here. I get what you're going through, and only hope that you will get lucky soon.

Thank you guys... I appreciate the kind gestures and words, it does help to some degree.

I don't know what to say that others have not already. Gaaa...maybe if you stop stressing and let nature take it's course things will get better. All I've got but I hope your dreams come true.

Bullet, my heart aches for you. Please keep in mind that old saying "when you least expect it".

I have a cousin and also a close friend who were in the same position. Tried (and tried and tried), trips to specialists, more trying and no success. They both decided to adopt. When my cousin and her hubby finally got their baby boy they were informed two months later that she was prego. My friend and her hubby adopted a boy and then a year and a half later a sweet girl. The next year they gave birth to their third child........followed by a fourth.

Don't let your mind dwell on wanting to have your own. Instead open your heart to the fact that somewhere there is a child waiting for you.

Miracles DO happen. I've seen the proof.

(((HUGS)))

Did you ever stop to think that the pressure your putting on yourself and hubby to conceive is creating sufficient stress that its actually preventing you from getting pregnant. You've only been married a short time - barely enough time to actually get to know one another so relax - forget about making a baby and simply enjoy the "romp in the hay" without any pressure or ulterior motives. Chances are once neither of you are under any pressure to reproduce - and are simply doing it to have fun - then when you least expect it there'll be a hot one in the oven. You've got a good 17-20 baby production years ahead of you so don't be in a rush.

mcauley wrote:

Did you ever stop to think that the pressure your putting on yourself and hubby to conceive is creating sufficient stress that its actually preventing you from getting pregnant. You've only been married a short time - barely enough time to actually get to know one another so relax - forget about making a baby and simply enjoy the "romp in the hay" without any pressure or ulterior motives. Chances are once neither of you are under any pressure to reproduce - and are simply doing it to have fun - then when you least expect it there'll be a hot one in the oven. You've got a good 17-20 baby production years ahead of you so don't be in a rush.

Once we decided we wanted to start having children, its hard to take the pressure off... its kind of all you can think about... but it is not like our sex life has just become hurry up and get it done so we can make a baby.... That is one thing I will never sacrifice. We've known each other for a long time but I understand your comment, we should just enjoy our years of marriage. The issue lies with my girl parts, with PCOS, my chances of getting pregnant dwindle far greater than a woman with healthy parts. I'm hoping to have a bun in the oven soon, but should it not occur in the next say, two years, we will consider adoption.

Does OHIP cover for Invitro if you have been diagnosed with PCOS? I knpw with my condition, if my one and only tube is in fact fully blocked then OHIP pays a good portion of it, if it is not, and only partially blocked then I pay for all treatment cost..

I know Pcos is different, but its still a condition...

In a more possitive note you still have both ovaries, at least you could work around that with many types of treatment, but like mcauly said, it often happends when your not thinking of it and let nature run its course... I know its hard to beleive that but I have heard of it soo many times..

Good luck Bullet, I wish you the very best!!

KB, it took me three years and a bunch of different trials at things, in order to conceive. Wasn't one of the easiest times in my life. In fact, it was pretty damn hard. BUT, the appreciation I have for my kids goes beyond what I ever dreamed of, because they were so darn hard to get. Not the second, just the first. ( I still love him too though. )

I have a friend that it took 10 years. TEN years. And here's the kicker. She never ovulated once in her life! So imagine, trying to get preggers without ovulating. They still tried, spent all their money on invitro, finally gave up when she finally landed full-time teaching after six years of part time.

I said "Now you'll get pregnant." Guess what? She got pregnant. All on their own. How weird is that?

I think it comes to you when it's supposed to. You may think you're ready but the forces that be may have other plans for you first.

The horrible thing is everyone will say "Just relax and it will happen" and you will want to kill the next person who says it. But guess what? It's true.

Hang in there. Focus on anything but that. Pretend you've given up. Put all your focus and concentration into something else. And it will happen.

It's one of the hardest things you'll have to do, but just think ........it's all down hill from there!